A dose of reality

I hate to go all lawyer on you all, but I regret to inform you that Michael's previous post may have suggested a reward that does not exist.  Oh OK, I'll cut to the chase:  there is no Golden Colon Award. So don't be afraid that your donation will lead to an awful tacky dust collector.  Unless of course you want a Golden Colon Award.  'Cause if that will lead you to all try to out-donate each other, please, I'll make it myself.  Heck, I'll subject myself to all sorts of embarrassments for a donation--anyone want an experienced Chicken Dancer for their next event?